I wasn’t too sure what I wanted to be when I grew up. But I always knew the kind of person I wanted to be. I had this image of myself, all grown up and I had a checklist which went with it. This checklist, was my understanding of happiness and success.
Prionka’s Checklist for Happiness & Success (Age: 12)
1) Coloured Stationary: I wanted to be surrounded by colours. I wasn’t very artsy ever, but I loved the aesthetics of it all. So I hoped to have coloured pens and stationary in my bag, regardless of my profession.
2) Big Bag: I knew I would be attached to small and big things. This logically meant I would need big bags.
3) Indoor Plants: As a child, I didn’t understand the power of nature, but I had grown up with indoor plants. They made me happy. I wanted the same in my house.
4) Writing a Book: My mind was full of make-believe stories and fictional characters. I wanted to bring them out someday, even if it meant scribbling on few pages and stapling them together.
5) Travel to a historical place: I wanted to see castles and palaces, and I wanted to marvel at the stories of kings and queens. I wasn’t sure if travelling would be affordable, so I did explore the idea of becoming an air hostess for a while.
6) Give a Speech: I was a shy kid, who couldn’t speak up loud enough for even the teachers to hear in the class. But I dreamt big. I dreamt of being the person who could give extempores, speeches and just own the microphone moments.
7) Wear Danglers: I had a role model. She was older, prettier and smarter. And she wore danglers, those long silver ear-rings. I wanted to wear them too but mom won’t allow me. So, I decided to own my own danglers as an adult, and wear them all the time.
8) Cushions: Cushions were coveted. I wanted them, and I wanted them in all colours.
9) Popular: I wanted to be popular and I wanted to be loved. The only gauge of this was to die and to see (as a floating soul) how many people were genuinely sad. Yeah, I was morbid!
So, I am a grown up now (on most days). And I have decided to see if I am as happy and successful as I wanted to be.
Prionka’s Current Reality Check
✓Coloured Stationary: I have it all. Coloured pens, coloured pencils, sticky-notes in 3 colours, coloured paper etc.
✓ Big Bags: Yup! Bottomless tote bags in different colours.
✓ Indoor Plants: Yes. Money plants are a favourite. They barely need care.
✓ Writing a Book: I did manage to write, and I didn’t have to staple the pages. The kind publishers did it for me. Sia was published in 2012.
✓ Travel to a Historical place: I have seen palaces in Rajasthan, Scotland, England, France and Luxembourg. I did not get to be the air hostess though 😦
✓ Give a Speech: I did manage to have many microphone moments. (Confession: Each time my voice carries in to a hall, I get startled and alarmed, but I carry on nevertheless).
✓ Wear Danglers: I own them, and I wear them (not always). I haven’t seen my role-model in many years now, so I don’t know if she wears them anymore. But, I do hear that she is unwell. Each time I wear my danglers, I think of her and wish her well.
✓ Cushions: Big and small and in many colours.
? Popular & loved: Yet to know this one. Do cry if I die please. Remember the floating soul might be watching to see if she ticked off the checklist.
All the important things seem to be in place. I think I am doing okay.
Prionka Ray 
Leave a Reply